On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
hearing that almost makes me feel good about peeing on the coffee table
I don't remember her name, all I remember is trying to suck the wedding ring off her finger.
Just got my cast off. My occupational therapist wants me to self-gratify. My clit is about to have an awesome weekend...
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
So drunk I thought the door was feeling me up for a seconds
Totally on the hot mess express last night. Mom said I was passed out on her kitchen floor. Told her I was drinking genuine tea.
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
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