you lied vaginas dont taste like gold fish!
noo i said youre golden if her vagina tastes like fish!
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
two fat guys on crotch rockets just invited me to 'party' with them at a del taco. why does this keep happening to me?
21 Of The Most Impressive Things Ever Seen In Porn
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
Monday funday. I brushed my teeth with antibacterial soap. hangover I did not have.
19 Parents Had Epic Reactions When Catching Their Kids Being “Bad”
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
I swear to the sweet baby jesus I didn't fill your freezer with salsa and my little pony toys, but I didn't stop them either.
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
I shaved my entire vagina for a man who had the personality of a potato and a C- orgasm. Life is a series of disappointments.
the staff put glowsticks in the urinals of the porta-pottys last night and honestly drunk me has never been more grateful for anything in his life
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.