I'm so bored and have no one to sexy text
We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
I didn't ride the struggle bus so much as drive it backwards off a cliff.
May or may not have just lost a contact hanging out Anthony's sunroof. Drunk. Hint: I can only see out of one eye right now.
It's 3 am and I'm buying cat food and batteries for my vibrator. Good thing I shaved my legs for this.
The fact that I can now puke rainbows on snapchat makes my life that much better
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
The ass gains better be worth it
Randomize
