The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
In case you were wondering, transporting lube in a ziploc bag is just as bad of an idea as it sounds.
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
When you finally get laid, I shall make you a trophy out of dildos
After the keg stand you collapsed, hit your head on the floor, started seizing and after 20 seconds got back up and said "hah, I remember my first beer"
Also I'm sorry for asking you to shave my vagina for me last night
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
Can't. Way too high. Forgot how to operate doors. Stuck outside.Come get me.
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
Randomize
