Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
I wish I loved anything like you love Tequila.
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
Watching the blind side bc I need a good cry to make sure I'm still human after this weekend's questionable life choices
I stole a tiki torch last night and just returned it. Things have been better.
Ok well my life just seems more exciting by default because I'm dating my married boss and sexting with my ex
Randomize
