I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Mym mom just came downstairs as I got ghome ans I'm trying to act SO CASUAL as i stabdh here hut icant help bur be like 'girl where's ther Turkey sandwiche s' haahaa
I literally need you to talke care of me soooo9o9oooooo drubj gril makin a sabdwiche. SO far its judst bred and paper towel...
Oh we will ALWAYS be together. Or I'll have to delete my Facebook altogether. I've drunkenly boobie trapped photos of us into every album. There's no way I'd ever have the patience to go through that deletion process.
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
Always wear a seatbelt when giving road head. I think I'm just going to tell people I don't remember how I got the fat lip.
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
and everyone will high five me and girls will approach me offering blowjobs
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
Life update: This fucking MacBook repair guy called me over last night for a booty call and he didn’t have a condom OR a bed
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
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