Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
oh hey summer self, welcome to endless thirsty thursdays and walks of shame.
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
I just conveyed my whole sex life to my mom over voicemail. Anddd, I'm hammered.
Top night. Top night.
You decided it was too difficult to walk down the stairs so you just rolled across his kitchen floor laughing like a maniac and trying to drink at the same time
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
Trust me, dating 38 and 20 year old dudes at the same time is the best. Money plus all of the sex. Finally figured out this relationship thing.
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
fuck emotions I should've gotten more cats
the most terrified I've ever been was seeing Danny Devito squirming on the ground in this underwear, covered in hand sanitizer, completely hairless
We're not ready for visitors right now.
wtf? who's we?
The Royal We: Me, My Vag, and I.
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
Randomize
