You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
i want to get drunk and sing the national anthem on your roof again please.
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
Because you touch yourself at night.
...What time of day am I supposed to do it?
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
I'm so sad at the lack of dick in my life I am going to get sauced and make rice krispy treats
You wanna know what I want to eat? Questionable Mexican food before I go drink. Makes for excitement. Will I puke it up or shit my pants
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
I woke up under a house in Key West
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
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