My sheets at my parents place are clean. No braveheart but I can paint myself, yell "freedom", and sword fight you with my cock. So come over.
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
True as that may be, are you coming to the birth of my imaginary child or not?
I drunken agreed to go wedding dress shopping with a stranger at the bar yesterday. She sent me an email asking what days I am free.
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
I started scrolling back in our texts looking for context and a picture of your dick rose like the Great Pumpkin in the middle of my screen.
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
Well you went to the bar with your crutches last night & everyone including the DJ started chanting "put your crutches in the air"
Randomize
