Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
I just realized I had sex more when i looked like a fat elton john. Fuck my life.
Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
Peter invited his little brother to smoke with us and he is trying so hard to pretend he's done it before. When he saw the weed he was like "hell yeah!" and everyone got completely silent and just looked at him
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
Can we go to the gas station to get cigarettes before we get drunk. It's hard enough to say Marlboro sober.
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
Randomize
