I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
My nipple rings set off the metal detector at the courthouse this morning.
Her little brother walked in right as I was finishing and was like "uhhh hey there's a lunar eclipse outside"
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
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he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
Anderson Cooper just came out.
Crying tears of glitter and rainbows right now. Gonna decorate my dildo like My Little Pony in his honor.
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
He came to my Harry Potter marathon wearing a Hogwarts uniform. Of course I fucked him.
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Company meeting and there he was. Felt a little weird like 'last night you were telling me how your dick loves me, and now we're listening to a report on sales figures'.
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
I started my period on international women's day. It's like the world is congratulating me and punishing me for being a woman at the same time
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
This can only be settled by a dance off.
The salt made it so good this margarita is touching my soul. I swear I'm not high BUT I want elote in a cup with the insides of a shrimp taco. I think that would make my life complete.
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