Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
all you kept yelling was "i'm bored and i'm sober"
Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to hit on someone with another guy's semen in your hair. not even at ihop.
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wish you could see how much hot sauce and broken glass are in our apartment right now.
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
Anyone who does not consider cereal and wine as a balanced breakfast needs to leave immediately.
When we get drunk one of us ends up running off and fucking someone in an inappropriate place, like the roof of the restaurant, or Greece, while the other convinces people not to worry and not to go looking. That good sir is a real mother fucking friendship.
Thats what I'm talking about
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
Remind me to never do anything where hiding something in my butt is the best course of action
Randomize