He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
Although I wish I was out drinking, this cough syrup has me slightly more optimistic than usual.. I heavily debating trying to find mystical creatures and selling them to rich people as pets
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
The cop told you to put your hands behind your back and you slurred "I'm not falling for that again"
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
You better be Eskimo Brother-ing the FUCK out of tonight right now. Long distance 'balls deep' high five
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
I promise that I won't shotgun beers with your boyfriend this time, Scouts Honor.
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
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