i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
I kind of wish I was already fat. So I could eat all I want and not worry about getting fat. Cause I'd already be at that point.
She asked me why there was $2 in the lunchmeat drawer of the fridge and BBQ sauce all over the kitchen... I'm not sure but I know it has something to do with you
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
There was a punch bowl full of straight vodka. Glass bowl, ladle, vodka, and no punch at all. It was something of a rough night
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
I guess he was telling a totally normal story about being a lifeguard and I wouldn't stop screaming "THAT'S LUDICROUS" at random intervals.
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
I don't go out. I live in my room watching Bridget Jones and thanking my vibrator for existing.
I've got enough liquor to do one of two things on Friday: 1.) Drink myself into a coma or 2.) lay in bed a drunk and cry lonely mess. Happy Valentines Day.
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
Randomize
