I pretty much can't stop smiling when I talk to you. Even when you talk about disease and infectious diarrhea.
I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
He kept trying to order 'sex on the tennis courts' for a drink last night
Just put a sign on a baby carriage that says "all daddy wanted was a blowjob" might get fired.
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You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
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I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
Why is there puke in my guitar?
Because you puked in your guitar.
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
This fucking storm better not ruin my sex plans this weekend
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