I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
The make-up sex just reminded me why we broke up in the first place.
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
I apologize in advance for attempting to drunkenly hookup with your sister
i knew you were okay when you wanted to eat in the ambulance
Sorry about sucking tonight. Drunk truck fucking is apparently not my strong point.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke
Moral of the story: always keep condoms in your bra
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
YOUR STATE IS STUPID
Did you miss a turn again?
WHAT FUCKING IDIOT DECIDED TO DESIGN AN ENTIRE FUCKING STATE WHERE YOU CAN'T MAKE A FUCKING LEFT TURN?!? FUCK NEW JERSEY
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
I'm like a great zombie Jesus.
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