she's like "i'm so proud of u" ... and then i threw up on myself
who are you and why are you in my phone as dr. seuss
recess is on disney at 4 in the morning, insomnia has never been so rewarding
Stealing vibrators from Walmart together was when I realized you'd be my Maid of Honor.
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
He came into your room last night to tell me he was leaving, when I woke up this morning he was facedown in your hallway. He didn't make it very far.
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
I can't remember if I puked before or after the shots of absinthe. Or why I thought shots of absinthe was a good idea.
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
Party bus got out of hand. Some guy pissed himself. Later, he couldn't find his house keys, so he kicked the back door in.
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
I'm so gassy and it's your fault.
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