We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
Waitress cut us off at Chili's bar. New low
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
He leaned off the deck, puked a waterfall of beer, looked back at everyone and said "it was just a burp".
And then, I saw the prophecy come to fruition. It was the Dick of Destiny.
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
As a gentleman, I asked her if she was sure and she just whispered "wreck me" in my ear. I took that as a green light.
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
You know my vagina and my heart have a mind of their own even when it’s pouring snow.
And here I am, playing fetch with my cat at two in the morning.
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