Important detail I forgot to tell you: leprechaun loves david bowie.
Going back to college after four years is reminding me why i love cheating... they dont let me cheat on tests but they sure try hard to make me cheat on my girl
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
YOU CAN RENT MIDGETS ON CRAIGS LIST
I told you not to ruin your birthday surprise!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
a girl just walked by me crying on the phone saying, "all I ever do is menstruate"
God I love incriminating evidence...wonder what the statue of limitations is on shitting on someones driveway
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
Someone brought brownies to work and I was skeptical to eat one then I remembered I was at work and there is no way there is weed in them. Haha I'm blaming you for that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Was looking through my phone and saw that drunk me took a tit pic in the Denny's bathroom..
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
This couple is walking their pig around campus
I sent him a tex saying, "I thought my intentions were clear" drunk me has some balls.
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
Randomize