dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
i want two things in life...emily to stop talking and a block of cheese.
in jail i did the beyonce ass shake for the police officers & called Sally from my collect phone in my cell & started singing "im in JAAAIL IM IN JAAAIL",
You drank almost the entire bottle of everclear and wanted to walk around. I guess your best friends sister is a cop and you wanted her to arrest you like the lil wayne song.... so sorry dude.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
you know that dress I got margarita and puke on? yeah, just returned it.
You kept spitting the skittles out cause you said they tasted like "balls of sandpaper"
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
Because of you I'm damaged goods. I'm a fucking soup can and you dropped me.
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
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