No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
I want Jason Statham to talk British to my vagina.
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
i'll never see her again. i cant remember her last name. this is like cinderella except prince charming drank too much jameson and couldnt save a phone number properly
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
This beer is not sobering me up at all
We all know tonight is going to end like every other night with you. drunk, pantless and confused. Dont try to switch things up.
Now have a vodka water and get your shit together
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
I was wondering how I got the burn marks on my boobs and then I remembered....
The baked potato bra?
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
I mean we all knew i was gonna get arrested eventually but shoplifting is lame so dont tell anyone. Well just let them assume public nudity or something
Randomize
