its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
Just mindlessly walked into the mens bathroom. My vagina has now become its own independent being, looking for penises. I'm just along for the ride.
im just going to wait until i dont feel like the grim reaper is having sex with me
The girl beside me at the laundromat is bitching a guy out on the phone for jizzing on her bedspread. She had to use a triple machine to wash it.
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
He asked if I had feelings for him while I was lying naked on the floor vomiting into a trashcan as he held my hair and fed me Pringles.
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
I feel like I've asked you "are you okay?" one too many times in the last 48 hours. You're hopeless.
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
If he doesn't get here soon I'm taking off my thong and eating his dinner.
Your phone just changed "liver" to "liquor" how dose that make you feel
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
What part of I just want to watch porn, eat Taco Bell, and masturbate did you not understand?
Don't get mad at me now, you have my car and all the doughnuts
Randomize
