with your own penis?
Dude, I just saw a bird vs. squirrel fight. A car won.
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
I love being Chipotle's first beer sale of the morning.
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
I JUST HAD PHONE SEX. WHILE TAKING A BATH. FOR AN HOUR. EATING A PLATE OF BURRITOS. TOP THAT SHIT.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
You had me at "let me see your balls"
But can mardi gras accurately capture the essence of my tiny rage?
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
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