All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
woke up to 35 texts all saying im cheating on her
me and last nights hook up spent two hr. figuring out a reply we went with i love you..
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
A freshman just referred to Home Improvement as 'tim the tool man show'. People born after 1990 are not people.
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
I did it again.
I drunk texted John McCain.
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
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