Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
Alcohol only hurts me because he loves me.
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
I wish the inside of the tampon box said "CONGRATULATIONS YOUR NOT A MOTHER!"
She refused to give me a hand job while we were watching a war movie saying she didn't wanna disrespect the soldiers
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
Hurry up. Some creepy guy with a "God is vengeful" flyer is asking where I wanna go most today. I think he's going to chop me into pieces.
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
you walked in, put on rap music and started chugging vodka
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
i now know why i keep getting pictures of poop. apparently someone put my number in a girls bathroom saying i am a poop lover.
you text any of them back? this is probably the most women you'll ever have texting you in your life. don't squander a good thing
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
Randomize
