I am a bulletproof tiger!
Haha. Nice, be careful tonight.
I'm gonna have to get my windshield replaced. Is the keg beat?
she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
today is like waiting for pizza day in elementary school, but with sex added
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
Currently microwaving whipped cream to make white Russians and hotboxing the kitchen while this random kid is dancing in the corner.
No, this is non-alcoholic oatmeal.
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash.
i need to stop establishing animals as safe words. Giraffe and Penguin are really awkward words to say during sex
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
Also mom is not happy about me telling her how much i want the women sprinters on the Olympics to beat me up
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
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