I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
Is your answer to that text seriously a right parenthesis
IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
We both got free alcohol and got laid by foreign men last night.
I'm not going out again for the rest of my life. I can't top this.
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
It wasn't until I lost my earring that I realized "I've been here before". Turns out we fucked a year ago. We've decided to make it a tradition.
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