He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
Put a customer on hold today while I threw up. If I don't get employee of the month, I'm suing.
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had to rip your toilet paper for you...
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
Yeah, but I think it would be a little awkward to explain to Mom that the girl I brought for lunch is not my girlfriend but just a fuck buddy who I met after she hit and totaled my car last month.
Last night I said "I'm so glad you broke up with your lesbian soccer mom girlfriend" I don't remember how he reacted I just remember trying to pee in the woods
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
You can't just say "I scored us a potential threesome" and then not text me back.
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