we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
He kept making me pretend I was his personal trainer. When I swallowed his cum he made me pretend I was drinking a protein shake. Thats actually what it tasted like.
He gave up on mugging us when Dave wouldn't stop laughing. He was wiggling his finger at the knife and making baby noises and giggling. The guy just walked away.
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
I mean, I'm not upset that HE's getting married, I'm upset his penis has to go through with it by default
I'm pretty sure that cute cop drove me home. Especially since I found his card in my purse.
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
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