I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
I just saw how many times I called you last night. You're welcome.
Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
Whats the opposite of morning wood? Whatever its called, everyone saw it when it fell out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
Stand up sex. Extremely, extremely difficult. I now know how pointe dancers feel.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Based off of the soaking wet clothes/towels/rugs, Eiffel Tower statue and monkey in the bathtub, I'm going to assume drunk me took a bath.
Are you really alive right now?
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
Just had someone from Hells Angels snort coke off my tits...so I'm pretty much done with life now. 💀
found a note from drunk me saying "don't worry i fed the mice". WHAT MICE?
Randomize
