This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
I'm starting to think The only feelings I have anymore are drunk and hung over
you can't hurt those
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just witnessed my roommate pick her nose and eat it in her sleep. Remember, you made out with that.
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
She is the epitome of a puke & rally. She picked a random hott guy at the bar & made him pinky promise not to leave while she took a power nap. She went & passed out in her friends car & apparently puked just outside the bar. She stumbled in & found the randome guy again & claimed she was golden. Made it to the after party & stayed up til 6 doing body shots off every girl she saw & hooked up with the random from the bar. I love her life
Change the recording on your voicemail. He found your number and my ass print on the car hood.
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
I mean I'm not saying I have my life together but I did just put nerds in a bottle of champagne and then drank from the bottle
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
Want to go to Victoria’s Secret? His fiancée is out of town and I’m going to try and stop the wedding with lingerie and lots adventurous sex
Absolutely! I love a good sexual filibuster!
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