Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
and then he said "my sister has the same underwear!" please come get me.
You don't know the meaning of what the fuck until you wake up naked and alone in someone's bed staring at a dead squirrel on their dresser.
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
I thought he wouldn't talk to me again. You know, what's that saying "why buy the cow when you can fuck it six hours after meeting"
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
When we were eating pie last night, I dropped some, and not only did you not judge me for far surpassing the 5 second rule, you let me use your foot to sock mop with. You're a good friend.
I gave him shit for taking my sloppy seconds and when I woke up my eyebrow was gone
My bank account got hacked so he showed up with a 6 pack wearing a superman cape to cheer me up and you question why I love him?
you found yr lighter in yr cleavage and said so that's where you've been all my life
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
Randomize
