Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
Then he claimed me as his prize for 3rd place in a wing eating contest. Too romantic.
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
Fuck. I have to get my shit together by lunch. Mission impossible.
She made this little rubber cap thing that looks like a brain to go on my dick. She calls it a "penis cap". Industrial design students are weird...
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
I know you can't find me. Somehow I ended up on the roof smoking a cig with the strippers that are on break. Way too drunk to deal with this right now.
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
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