Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
The bride says you won't want any of the single ladies...
Let's let the open bar be the judge of that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
I'm hungover in the park, and some guy just handed me a business card for his church. I can feel Jesus' disapproval running through my fingertips
all i wanna do is drink skittled vodka, fuck my gf, and pass out in my neighbors hot tub naked
No one should ever have to Neosporin their nipples. At least he apologized.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
Dude I pissed in her little brother's closet and when I tried to flush the doorknob her parents came out and saw me standing there naked, no more ambien for me
I left you a really long drunk voicemail and I remember something about a bat
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