youll never guess who i didnt fuck at that party
The nice sales man at 711 gave me a handful of free lighters for buying a carton of cigarettes. I guess the depressed damsel in distress look works for me.
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
When she asked why I felt bad I said that it may have had something to do with the gin and cold pizza I had for breakfast.... And then I reflected on what my life has become.
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
Used my brand new sperrys as a trash can to throw up in and woke up with someone's random key in my hair...new year new me:)
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
If not, I can murder my liver twice...it's like a cat, it has 9 lives
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
I was singing Colors of the Wind and swigging vodka and still felt like more of an adult.
Randomize
