we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
He'd rather cuddle with his shitty little miniature dog than the half naked girl in his bed. I've lost all hope for him and my vagina
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
I cried while dry heaving in the back of the car to the New York song with jay z in it. I was singing it inbetween gags.
Hey you're my best friend, I'm sorry I picked my vagina over my heart last night.
so in case you needed a ticket for the Hot Mess Express, I'm the conductor now.
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
The guy I hooked up with last night left me alone with his dog AND IT JUST SHIT ON THE FLOOR. WHAT DO I DO
I'm just so full of love and alcohol
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
I'm not drunk or hungover and I don't have to work. My body is sooo confused!
Randomize
