If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
Um, so I couldn't say it in person, but if you find my underwear in your office. Sorry. I couldn't find them, so yea.
I just found what appears to be a tooth in my purse...anybody missing one?
We will have to go big on the 4th! Nothing says independence like the impending doom of an ankle monitor
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
She had a cast on when I met her, but she blamed me for breaking her arm this morning. I'm gonna marry this girl.
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
We should probably feel disgusted that we took turns eating and drunkenly passing around a burrito the size of a small dog but i’m ok with it.
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
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