I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
Weirdest conversation with my dad. He just told me he didn't shave his pubes.
I'm leaving my hospital band on when we go drinking tonight. I'm aiming for pity sex.
You just handed me your ATM card and wrote your PIN number on a dollar bill and said "for bail money."
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
I wouldn't blow him for all the queso in the world.
I'd rather blow that homeless guy who asked me to breast feed him.
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
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