Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
Just asked my dog if he was proud of me for making it home. That drunk.
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
I just wanted to check in on you and you replied with a selfie with your Coney Island waiter and the caption "after his shift we're dropping acid together"
He has great stamina, he knows how to use his tongue, and he's hung like a goddamn Pegasus. I can overlook the man bun.
Ugh. I just found a cum stain on my mermaid pants. Now I can't return them.
Oh god it's open bar.
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
He stole one of my good bras again. If I'm not getting laid I'm not putting with this shit. Also it's a walk of shame for you today, my car is suicidal again.
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
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