wow wtf my bar tab was 80 dollars
IT WAS DOLLAR BEER NIGHT
i just saw a man pushing two thirtys of beers in a stroller while his little kid ran to keep up. father of the year
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
Judging by the amount of alcohol multiplied by the amount of her exes here, tonight will be ending in tears.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
i watched you ride a mechanical penis. nothing is awkward between us anymore.
Apple trackpads and semen don't mix. On the way to the Apple Store.
What do you need? A swimsuit and a liver of steel? What else?
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
Shouting "one vagina to rule them all" was probably not the best way to meet our best mates fiance
I feel like I've asked you "are you okay?" one too many times in the last 48 hours. You're hopeless.
I just connected with one of your drug dealers on LinkedIn.
He was lasting forever and I couldn't take it so I faked an asthma attack
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
Randomize