But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
my roommate's gf just broke up with him and hes in his room crying and listening to coldplay while beating off to pictures of her...
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
I fucking, woke up on a couch with a towel as a blanket to someones lion king ringtone.
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
Well, I have a text in my phone that just says "Scrumtrelescent" from a girl I have in here as "Cheesy Tits", so you figure out how my night was going.
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
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