I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
I'm not upset with you; I'm upset with Fox News.
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
Dude, he sent me a pic of his dick. I thought dating a married man wouldn't remind me so much of high school. Seriously.
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
She just looked down there and said "i breed horses. this is better than anything ive ever seen."
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
She cried the whole movie and got kicked out for saying "[Santa's beard] looks so soft I wanna stick my dick in it." We're going again next week. Drunk animation majors are the best
Can we talk about how i am holding a tupperware container of my own puke in the back of my grandparents car while my sister drives
After we had sex he made me watch a Top Gun highlight video...
I wouldn't even cut tickets or put ppl in jail I'd just hand out punches to the mouth and Liam Neeson throat chops
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
Quick question, did I crash teeth with you when I snogged you, or did I headbutt something between the car and the bed last night?
Randomize
