fuck, i never want to drink again I drunk dialed matt last night and broke up with him the second night in a row. FUCK QUADFEST
Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
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sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
You were carrying around a milk crate, randomly putting it down calling out 'praise be to the milk gods' and making people pray to it.
if I just puked into my own hand, but then cleaned it up quickly, quietly, and calmly, am I still a trainwreck?
why are our drunk alter egos so much more successful than us?
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
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Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
He came over apologized for his lack of sexual skills. Cleaned my kitchen cooked me dinner. And gave me another one minute stand. I think im okay with this
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
How do you explain to your parents that you can't go to the library because you got banned for being drunk in there... on a Sunday afternoon?
That's $100,000 of quality education right there.
So my dad just asked, "did you leave without pants a lil bit ago?"
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