They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
I was in holding with a guy that got a DUI on a hover round. He was so nice. We're hanging out tonight.
We found you passed out clutching your purse. There was 16oz of unopened cheddar cheese inside. You just kept saying SALSA YES.
I got carried to one bar. Got a piggy back ride to the next bar. I was just testing our drinking team for st pattys day to make sure they are able to handle me more drunk than that.
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
Oh dude I know. When something that's supposed stop pregnancies taste like chocolate something's up
i hate going to her parties because i always know everyone there which means everyone knows my ex which means i wont get laid
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
I wrote an entire paper in under an hour about The Nightmare Before Christmas. I was also high as shit and pretty sure I dedicated half the page to the animation but still.
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
Randomize
