gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
That money I left you should go to the stripper that fell asleep in your bed. Sorry
I feel like every time I get the courage to masturbate to a guy from Game of Thrones, they kill him off.
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
I've talked to too many cops in one week and I haven't even committed any crimes. I hate the suburbs
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
How does fucking Canada get Justin Good Guy Take Me Now, Just Fuck Me In The House of Commons Trudeau, and our new President looks like he bathes in cheetoh dust and sin?
She was trying to be sexy well putting on my condom with her mouth when her cat pounced from the corner of the room witch caused her to gasp and inhale the condom
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
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