I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
What do you think that old couple was thinking when they saw me puking in the QT parking lot at ten in the morning?
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
I just found her phone in the quesadilla maker...
my favorite part of the night was when I was in the bathroom frantically trying to get my cat whiskers and nose off to make hooking up less awkward
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
You have no idea the kind of bodily contortions I had to do to access your neighbor's WIFI
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
You peed in the sink and kept shouting "I'm the black swan! Ca-caw!"
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