yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
I would rather wake up to a truck driver than wake up to her
I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
this guy is so high, he just ate half of a frozen blueberry muffin and half of a frozen poppyseed muffin, then proceeded to make a "hybrid poppyberry muffin"
Scott woke me up by cracking a beer open in my face. Best friends are awesome.
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
I had to put a towel over my laptop because the little power light was too bright. New hangover low.
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
I came to the party for him. I don't know where he went, but I mentioned being hungry and his housemate brought me a huge tupperware container of berry cobbler. I think I'll stay.
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
i need to stop meeting underage girls and letting them into the bar. i mean yea its a surefire way to get laid without having to tell them I'm 26 but i feel like as a bouncer I'm focusing on all the wrong things
drunk and crying about Shakespeare- how's your night?
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
Randomize
