tequila makes my crab dance SOOOO much better
Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
Remember when we did the egg drop from the Dyson building? Her vag is like that, except with a ham, and the ham doesn't make it. I'll be back to the apartment in ten.
you know its a sad night when you can actually see and hear sitcoms on at the bar
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
the arrest was probably divine intervention, cause i think we were heading to an ill-advised threesome.
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
A worker across the alley is wearing your sombrero sans cat barf.
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
I'm at a winery and there's a 50 yr old woman sitting at a table alone with a bottle of wine and the only time I've seen her get up is to harass the hot dog guy
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
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