how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack...
Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c?
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
Don't they also have a lot of serious head injuries?
I didn't say I wanted to marry one of them. Or that I want one to perform surgery on me. I just want to have hot, dirty, MMA style sex.
You should make a checklist to ensure they are quality material. Here's mine: wearing shoes, not drunk, very hot, has teeth, speaks english. You never know
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
If more people understood that brunch is at 3pm the world would be a better place because you don't have to wake up early. Breakfast food is important
I described my life as a 7 layer cake of death
He woke up to me masturbating during the presidential address. Now he won't stop making jokes.
I tried to cut you?! I'm sorry! PS where's my hair?
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
Randomize
