You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fun fact: Antibacterial soap will not take the combined smell of bbq sauce and vagina off your hands.
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
I literally forgot every French word I knew and blurted out “mange moi” so he went down on me like I was some baguette fresh outta the oven!!!! I passed out.
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